Author Archives: New Balls

Run 1746 – The Green Man, Putney Heath, 28th February 2019

Glow trail around Putney Heath and Wimbledon Common set by your scribe, New Balls Please.  The pack was decked out in glow-stick bracelets and neckbands and random splodges of day-glow makeup, and followed a trail of luminescent flour.  Not always easy to find the route though, and even the hare got lost on a couple of occasions!

I think everyone managed to get to the drink stop (except perhaps KC) and back safely to the pub, though there could still be some lost souls wandering around the common even now.

The RA, Butt Plug, had done a good job of keeping the rain at bay during the run, and presided over the usual antics in the circle.

 

 

 

Run 1745 – Duffy’s Bar, Ealing, 21st February 2019

Our hare, Rambo, almost missed the start of his own trail, arriving just in time but somewhat breathless form setting this marathon, which turned out to be somewhat on the lengthy side at more than 10.5 km. But then we would expect no less from a Rambo trail. Also, as promised, plenty of shiggy and several scrambles up and down a series of earthworks adjacent to the M4, in an area never before hashed by West London (even Pope verified this claim).

Eventually most of us got the the drink stop for a very welcome hot cider/calvados punch plus shortbread.  Just what was needed after that slog.

Back in Duffy’s Bar, KMA officiated in the circle and handed out down downs to the hare, our visitor from the Florida Hash (also called Duffy as it happens), and a hash virgin from Hanwell.  Trophy WLH beer mugs were also awarded to Who Killed Kenny, Hands On, and Come Forth in Orange for having participated in (at least) 100 hashes with West London.

Run 1743 – The Bell and Crown, Chiswick, 7th February 2019

The expectations for this run were not great when the hare for the evening, Generator, announced at the start that the On-out was in both directions!  Which did indeed turn out to be the case, much to the confusion of the pack.

She also demonstrated her ingenious trail marker flour dispenser, in the form of a plastic milk bottle with a hole in the bottom.  Whilst an interesting idea in theory, in practice the amount of flour dispensed was so slight that only those with particularly good eyesight and night vision were able to pick out the trail, which meandered around the streets of Brentford/Chiswick/Kew.

Eventually some of us FRBs with a smattering of local knowledge managed to find our way to the drink stop, only to encounter a lonely looking Moron with a bag of crisps, but no drink.  After waiting for 15 minutes and still no sign of the hare with the drink, several of us headed back to the pub for some beer. (Apparently the hare with the drink did eventually arrive, though by some accounts,  not necessarily worth waiting for).

Down downs were awarded accordingly in the circle, once the hashers had found their way back to the pub.

Run 1738 – The Watermans Arms, Brentford, 3rd January 2019

The first run of the new year was hared by Ryde and Table Whine, and was the first of several celebrations to mark the start of their retirement from the world of work.  Hence, they kicked off the proceedings wearing their slippers, and promised us hot Horlicks for the drink stop.

The trail was set around the scenic backstreets of Brenford, and was something of a nostalgia trip for at least two of the pack.  The length of the trail did indeed turn out to be just right, as promised. As the hare helpfully pointed out, if it had been any shorter, we would not have got back to the pub, and had it been any longer we would have overshot our destination.  A drink-stop was laid on featuring some hot toddy. Not Horlicks, but OK under the circumstances.

Back at the pub, something of a crisis atmosphere prevailed. Gordon, the landlord, had been rushed to A&E earlier in the day. His deputy was gamely trying to serve a mass of thirsty hashers, and was down to his last barrel of beer.   Luckily Gordon did make it back before the end of the evening, apparently all well, and the beer flow was duly restored.

RA duties were performed by Wacker and various visitors and a virgin were duly awarded down-downs.  Then Rambo briefly took over the RA role to inform the circle that one of our number had been awarded a MBE in the New Years Honours List.  In fact the recipient of this award was none other than Wacker himself!   Arise, Sir Wacker, we are not worthy to run in your footsteps, etc, etc.