Hare – K4.
This week’s run will be from The Viaduct pub, 221 Uxbridge Rd, London W7 3TD Map Link. The nearest station is Hanwell and there will be P trail from there to help you find this pub. The run will start from the pub at our usual time of 19.15 Hours
Hares: Cocaine Charlie and Cock Doctor.
Pub: The Roebuck
Station: Fulwell.
This week’s run will be from The Roebuck, 72 Hampton Rd, Teddington, Hampton TW12 1JN Map Link . The nearest station is Fulwell, on the mainline from Waterloo, and there will be a trail of chalk P arrows from there to help you find this pub. the run will start from the pub at our usual time of 19.15 hours and there will be somewhere to store bags for its duration..
Hare: Kenny
This week’s run will be from The Foresters, 2 Leighton Rd., London W13 9EP Map Link. the nearest station is West Ealing, on the Elizabeth Line, and there will be a trail of chalk P arrows from there to help you find this pub, which is also accessible from Northfields Tube station. The run will start from the pub at our usual time of of 19.15 hours and they will store our bags behind the bar for its duration.
Hare – Bhopal
This weeks run will be from The Chancellors, 25 Crisp Road, Hammersmith, London, W6 9RL Map Link. There will be a P-trail from the Hammersmith & City, Piccadily and District Line Stations. The run will start from the pub at our usual time of 19.15 hours . World-famous pizzas may be ordered before the run. Hashers are advised to bring torches and cups. There will be a drink stop so bring your collapsible cups, if you have one.
Hare – Sir Humpsalot
This week’s trail will be from The Royal Oak, 13 Richmond Rd, Twickenham TW1 3AB (Map Link). The nearest station is Twickenham and there will be a trail of P arrows from there to help you find this pub. The run will start from the pub at our usual time of 19.15 hours and there will be bag storage for its duration, but as always, please leave valuables at home. Torches will be required, and bring your collapsible cups as well, for a drink stop!
Hare – On Your Back
This week’s run will be from The Duchess, 320 Goldhawk Rd, London W6 0XF (Map Link). The run will start at the usual time of 7:15, and the pub will store our bags (Possibly secure, but unconfirmed: as usual, please do not bring valuables) for the duration. It is unlikely that the hare will take the trail through any parks without lighting, as most will be shut due to the time of year, however torches likely still be useful. There will be a P trail from nearby Stamford Brook District Line station.
Hare – On Your Back
This week’s run will be from The Pilot, 56 Wellesley Road, Chiswick W4 4BZ Map Link . There will be a trail of chalk p-arrows from the nearest station, Gunnersbury (District Line, and Overground between Richmond and Stratford). The run will start rom the pub at our usual time of 19.15 hours and the pub will store our bags for its durations.
This run number celebrates the year of the Hare’s birth. Unless we recruit some very young hashers in the very near future, this will be the last time this ever happens.
There will be a drink stop, so please bring your collapsible cups.
Loads of live music throughout the day all over Brentford, with plenty of street food stalls and a plethora of good pubs. Join the Urbane Foxes at the Six Bells from 8:30pm to round off your evening with a selection of rock and pop favourites from 60’s to the present day.
Hares – Cock Doctor and Cocaine Charlie
The run this week will be from The Pilot, 56 Wellesley Road, Map Link. The nearest station is Gunnersbury, on the Richmond branch of the District Line. Leave by the back entrance of the station (turning right after the barriers) and turn right at the exit from the station to follow the footpath to where it meets Wellesley Road, then turn right; the pub is less than 150 metres on the left. There will be a trail of chalk P arrows from the station to help you find this pub. The run will start from the pub at our usual time of 19.15 hours and the pub will provide bags storage for it duration.
There will be seasonal drink stop, so you should bring your collapsible cups.
Hare – Pope
This week’s run will be from Ryan’s, 282 Northfields Avenue, W5 4UB Map Link . The nearest station is Northfields tube, on the Piccadilly Line and there will be a trail of chalk P arrows from there to help you find this pub. The run will start from the pub at our usual time of 19.15 hours and the pub will store our bags for its duration.
Hare – Love Deuce
This week’s run will be from The Gregorian, 96 Jamaica Road, SE16 4SQ Map Link. There nearest station is Bermondsey tube station on the Jubilee Line and there will be a trail of P arrows from that station to help you find the pub, which is just two minutes walk away. The run will start from the pub at our usual time of 19.15 hours and the Hare has booked a room for us where we can safely store bags for its duration.
Hare -KMA
This week’s run will be from the The Dukes Head, 42 The Vineyard, Richmond TW10 6AN Map Link. The nearest station is Richmond and there will be a trail of chalk P arrows from the back exit of this station, onto Lower Church Road, to help you find the pub. the run will start from the pub at our usual time of 19.15 hours and the pub will store our bags for its duration. Bring a torch, and a collapsible plastic cup if you have one, because there will be a drink stop.
Hare – Kenny
This week’s run will be from the Rack and Tenter, 45 Moorfields, Moorgate, London EC2Y 9AE. Map Link. The nearest station is Moorgate, on the Circle, Hammersmith and City, Metropolitan, and Northern lines. There wil be a trail of chalk P’s from the station to the pub. The run will start from the pub at our usual time of 19.15 hours. There will be a drink stop so please bring a collapsible cup. Please contact the hare if you would be prepared to act as a bag sitter in the pub.
Hare – Mop
This week’s run will be from the Dukes Head, The Vineyard, Richmond, TW10 6AZ Map Link. The nearest station is Richmond, tube and mainline, and there will be a trail of chalk P arrows from the back exit from this station ,onto Lower Church Road, to help you find the pub. The run will start from the pub at our usual time of 19.15 hours and the pub will provide an area for us to leave our bags for its duration. Bring a torch, it will be essential, and a collapsible cup, if you have one, because there will be a drink stop.
Hare – No Fore Play
Our last run before Christmas will be from The Candlemaker pub,136 Battersea High Street, SW11 3JR Map Link. The nearest station is Clapham Junction. When leaving the station do so via the Grant road exit, this can only be accessed using the underpass and is on the North side of the station. There will be a trail of chalk P arrows from there to help you find this pub. The run will start from the pub at our usual 19.15 hours. The pub will provide bag storage. There will be a drink stop on trail.
On On and a Merry Christmas to you all.
P.F.
Hare – Rambo
This run will be from Ryan’s 282 Northfield Avenue W5 4UB Map Link. The nearest station is Northfields Tube on the Piccadilly line and there will be a trail of chalk P arrows from there to help you find this pub. The run will start from the pub at our usual time of 19.15 hours and the pub will store our bags for its duration. The run will end back at the pub, the Hare having decided that it is too cold for an A to B. Rambo’s trails tend to be “adventurous” so bring a torch, also a cup as there will be a drink stop.
Hares – Smart Arse & Charlatan
The run will be from The Eagle, 250 Ladbroke Grove, London W10 5LP map link. The nearest station is Ladbroke Grove Tube on the Circle and Hammersmith & City lines and there will be trail of chalk P arrows from there to help you find this pub. Buses 23, 52, 70, 228 and 295 stop at St. Charles Square very close to the pub. The run will start from the pub at our usual 19.15 Hours. The Hares have arranged bag storage at the pub and a reserved area for the Hash to enjoy the selection of three real ales that the manager has promised will be available, and there will be a drink stop towards the end of the trail. Bring a torch as some of the trail will be off road.
With the lifting of many Covid restrictions registration for West London runs is no longer mandatory but is still encouraged as it gives the Hare an indicative pack size in advance to advise the pub and registration has been useful to the Hash Cash as an aid to keeping stats and collecting subs so if you plan to come on this run please register by clicking on This Link.
Hare – Ryde
Registration is required for all participants in West London runs during the current pandemic. If you plan to come on this run please register ASAP by using This link
This week’s run will start from The Forester, 2 Leighton Road, Ealing, London W13 9EP map link. The nearest station is Northfields Tube on the Piccadilly Line and there will be a trail of chalk P arrows from that station to help you find the pub. It will be a staggered start, runners should start between 18.45 and 19.00 hours, walkers can start any time after 18.30. Runners starting after 18.50 should mark through checks when they are called. The Pub will provide bag storage, speak to the staff about this if the Hare is not available. Please do not start any earlier than the above times as the Hare will be setting the trail alone and it would put her under undue pressure.
There will be drink stop on trail which will not be open before 19.30 hours and the Hare has booked tables for at least 24 Hashers in the public bar of the Foresters for after run drinks. Hashers who would prefer to drink in the open air are free to make their own arrangements with the pub to book a table in their Garden.
Hare – Dunny Penny
Registration is required for all participants in West London runs during the current pandemic. If you plan to come on this run please register ASAP by using This Link.
The trail will start from Teddington Lock, near The Anglers pub, Map Link and there will be a trail of chalk P arrows from Teddington station to guide you to the start point. Start on trail any time after 18.30 hours, the faster you run the later you should start. The trail will be 9 km long with shortcuts. Duration: 50 – 60 mins for runners and about the same for SCBs. There will be a drink stop on trail which will be open from 19:20 hours. The Hare has booked a large number of tables for us in the garden of the Anglers from 20:00 hours, this will be about 5 mins walk from the drink drink stop. Entry to the pub will be via top secret password to be revealed in confidence at the drink stop.
Tips from the Hare: The trail uses a small area, and is will be very tightly marked to take us through some great terrain. There will be few checks to keep you on the best bits of the area. FOLLOW THE TRAIL MARKINGS – especially important in the first 5km / 30 minutes, if you try to be clever and/or use local knowledge to jump across to runners you see in the distance you will not only miss out on some lovely territory but could end up getting very confused and running round in ever decreasing circle until you disappear up your own bum.
The drink stop is not the main event, please support our local hospitality industry by attending the pub after the run. The Hare may need to adjust our booking according to how many register, so please register ASAP using the above link, we have re-introduced the field on the registration form to indicate whether or not you plan to come to the pub after the run, please use this.
The Hare will be available on the WLH3 runners on trail Whatsapp group from 18:30 to 20:30 to help out the challenged.
Our hare for the evening will be KMA.
Those of you who have not already installed the Zoom app on your device may wish to Install Zoom in advance, not strictly necessary but might save time on the night. Please observe the following points of etiquette for our Zoom circles.Run nr 1713 – Coach & Horses, 27 Barnes High Street, London, SW13 9LW
A bagsitter may be needed
Hare: Roll Back
P-trail from Barnes Bridge Station (National Rail)
Here is a map showing locations of some of the WLH runs during 2016. Clicking on a run location will allow you to view the trail for that run.
Hopefully this will be helpful if you are a hare trying to decide where to set your next trail.
Run Nr 1536 – Ship, 10 Thames Bank, London SW14 7QR.
Map
Hare: Hobo
P-trail from Mortlake national rail station
Hare Yorkie
A night of almost. Its almost 7:15, there is no sign of the hare and almost no-one notices. The Hare arrives, time passes, and almost everyone is quite happy to stay in the pub until the hare nudges the GM, at which point almost everyone shambles outside into the cold night, leaving a few lingering inside the pub until the run actually gets going.
We’re off. Down to the canal and turn left, not the way we usually run from this pub. We almost like the idea until we get to the first false trail mark and have to go all the way back.
Then it’s down the tow path the normal way toward the gate we almost always go through and which almost half of the pack runs past, despite there being no trail that way. Eventually, we all get together again in the fields where almost all of us get caught up in more false trails – some of the Hare’s making and some of our own.
It was great being off the hard surface and into grass, so rare in a city based Hash. There was less light pollution, we were bathed in light from the moon in its Waxing Gibbons phase, and often dazzled by the arc lights some of us wore on our heads. One feature of these light conditions is that flour can take on the colour of its surroundings and become almost invisible, which is why almost all of the pack ended up having to follow the Hare while also enjoying the shiggy.
Horsenden Hill looms. We almost always run up it, so the Hare has cannily set the trail around it for a change. This doesn’t stop some of the pack, including Pope, from running up it on the off chance of spotting a trail at the top while the rest of the pack struggles with disbelief and the above lighting conditions until , finally, salvation appears in the form of a road and we can make out the run markings again.
From then on, it was an on street trail, set with the guile of an experienced Hare who knows the area well. It was never the right option to take the “obvious” exit from a check and almost all of the pack were unaware of how far they had to go until they were almost Home, thanks to the back streets and footpaths used. Spirits were raised as “The Black Horse” came into view, and crushed when we realised it was the wrong “Black Horse”.
Back at the pub, after a decent interval, Wacker presided over the Circle and awarded down downs to:
The Hare, Yorkie;
Love Deuce, for Twerking (“A sacred, traditional practice originating from the Amhara tribe. The act of twerking occurs when one’s legs move in such a way that causes the buttocks to resonate, connecting the participant with cosmic energy. It can be used as an act of communication and also can allow the user to communicate with the dead.” (http://www.urbandictionary.
Stay Over, for Minding the Step;
Tash, for Next Week;
F Shakespeare for reminding us that there was an old brothel on the trail – to which his after dd comment was that the Pride tasted like the whore’s mouth (before or after? We never got to find out);
Tinkerbell and Eeyore, for returning
Pope, for not being able to distinguish between Love Deuce and Dingo’s rear ends (He also, very cautiously avoided letting on as to which he preferred);
Butt Plug, and his Harem of Roll Back, Dingo and Love Deuce, for almost going to Benidorm to run a half marathon (almost as it is this weekend)
And finally, Adam the Lager Drinker, a virg*n, for doing two laps of the pub car park by way of a run.
As according to Pickled F*rt run write ups are now subject to editing and censorship I have decided that 2 versions of the evening are now required to confuse both the censor and anyone else with nothing better to do with their time than read WLH3 run write ups. There is “THE GRUMPY OLD MAN”version and the” normal” version, I will leave it to the reader to decide which one is which.
The pack descended on Hampstead for an unseasonal night run, most of which was off road on the heath, but being the bunch of intelligent forward planners we are, most of us had remembered to bring a torch and had full confidence in the trail laying abilities of the co hares, our esteemed GM, Dingo and Eric.
For some blo8dy stupid reason our idi8t Hare Raiser decided that Hampstead in the pitch dark would be a wonderful venue and failed to make it doubly clear on the website to bring an extremely powerful torch and then to compound it all, allow the run to be set by some femininazi suffragette bayarch, Dingo and the most infamously inept hare in WLH3 history, Eric. Talk about a recipe for disaster!
The weather had behaved itself and the night was reasonably mild for the time of the year and the pack set out across the heath on a variety of terrain, woodland, open heath, paved paths, muddy tracks taking in all the heath in its autumnal glory. The checks were well marked and not too difficult and all in all was an excellent example of a run for our 2 virg8ns, Amy and Clare and also vindicated the decision of long time LH3 harriette, Car Say No to check out the other hash in London (City of course being a checkless black top sprinting club rather than a hash). After a reasonable length, but not too long a trail, the markings finally led the pack up Parliament Hill with its excellent views of London for a welcome drink stop consisting of port, red wine and some homemade chocolate rocky road made by our very own (call me Nigella), Dingo. Predictably enough the grateful pack made short work of the refreshments on offer and then ambled back on the welcome downward slope to the pub.
Cursing ourselves for not wearing at least 3 layers we stupidly braved exposure and then potential broken limbs on the quagmire that is Hampstead Heath in winter (that’s why we go there in spring and summer, f*wits!). As we slipped and stumbled in the dark trying to find what few markings there were, I thought there’s no chance our 2 virg8ns Amy and Clare and LH3 visitor, Car Say No will come back again, even a City 2 check, 8 miler will be a welcome relief after this latest hashing master class in disaster. After what seemed half a lifetime and somehow having avoided serious injury (no thanks to the idi8t hares) the entirely predictable drink stop venue was the top of Parliament Hill with the same old boring vista of London. You would have hoped that the refreshments on offer would have compensated for the view, but not a bit of it, Eric had already guzzled half the port and to add insult to injury, it was not even a decent vintage, add to that a box wine better suited to embalming corpses and some kind of chocolate flavoured concrete that did for 3 of my fillings and you get the picture. The only redeeming feature was a short downhill on inn that didn’t even need much marking from the hares it was so predictable.
After a nice downhill amble the pack repaired to the pub to replenish lost body fluids with a decent selection of beers and even wine for the harriettes. It was a pleasant surprise to find that the pub had laid on a welcoming buffet of rice, ratatouille and chicken in a nice creamy sauce (Dingo had plainly done some good PR with the landlord). Seeing how the pack hoovered up the fare on offer, seconds were swiftly provided and it was a well fed pack that was called outside to the circle by our RA for the evening Wacker.
Finally we got back to the pub only to discover it was another yuppified gastro pub charging £4 a pint and god knows what for the plonk they called wine. Having somehow felt guilty about bankrupting the hash, they laid on a buffet for the hash, a bit of boiled rice that hadn’t even been cooked in organic saffron scented chicken stock, some Frog veggie dish and a bit of battery farm chicken in some bland cook in sauce. The portions were so meagre they had to bring out more before we suffered from malnutrition. To cap it all we were dragged out into the freezing cold for the privilege of listening to Wacker spouting bullsh*t in the circle.
The following were justly convicted of their crimes and in the non sexist spirit of WLH3, girly down downs of Pimms were offered as well as the more traditional beer.
Dingo and Eric as hares, Simon/Casual for hashing once a year when there is food on offer, Rambo for mud wrestling, Butt Plug for thinking he could do a half marathon with no training, Clare and Amy virg8ns, Spare Rib deputising for LH3 visitor Car Say No (who had driven off), Your scribe for being illiterate enough to have to spend£285 on a creative writing course to create these semi literate masterpieces for the WLH3 archives, Next Week for playing with gadgets and a couple of others that I could neither remember or decipher from Wackers scrawled notes.
What the hell is the circle coming to when we give out girly drinks like Pimms, is that why the subs went up to £2 a run, for f*ks sake! Let these feminists drink beer, it’s good enough for blokes to swallow so why not them? One of these days there will be an RA who can a) give down downs that are actually worth recording and b) be legible enough to record. As you thick b*stards can surmise it was the usual predictable trash along with some ridiculous notion that the scribe be enrolled on a creative writing course, well stuff that, you ain’t educated like wot I is.
On On
Mad Cow
No No
Grumpy Bovine
Halloween is traditionally the night when the gates of hell are thrown asunder and Satan and his every fiend and fury are free to roam the face of God’s Earth and to taunt and terrify mortal men until the breaking dawn on the feast of All Saints’ Day banishes them back to the foul pit from whence they came.
In these more secular times it is however just an excuse to get dressed up in scary costumes and get sloshed.
The first horror that confronted us at the end of the short P trail form Balham station was the Pub, an over poncified gastro job, but they did look after our bags and gave us a few free pints so perhaps we can overlook the dreadful décor and excruciating karaoke that was taking place at one end of the pub.
The second horror was Blunder’s trail. Many of the pack had dressed for the occasion and one unkindly remarked to me that the trail also seemed to be in disguise, a City trail passing itself off as a West London one! If one can imagine cannot imagine anything more diabolical than that then I do not think we should know about it. Indeed the trail did seem to consist of a lot of pavement, much beloved of our City friends, and some did question why it was quite so long when one South London Street looks much the same as another, and what exactly a run through well-lit streets had to do with the spooky traditions of Halloween. These individuals had obviously not fathomed Blunder’s subtle cunning {note that this is the first time in the history of the English language that those last three words have ever appeared together in the same sentence}. The reason the trail was this length was because Blunder had carefully planned it to be exactly 6.66 miles long! His clever Halloween joke was possibly lost on those without an accurate GPS and a detailed knowledge of the Book of Revelations and so I am happy to reveal it now. Please be careful not to injure yourselves as you fall about laughing.
Anyway Blunder was kind enough to stop as getting bored on trail by entertaining us, once again, with his mobile sound system as we ran. This is such an amusing feature that I hope we are entertained with it again sometime, perhaps in two or three years’time. There was of course a drink stop with cheese and sweets all washed down with lashings of Bloody Mary (what else).
Back at the pub we had down downs but I am afraid I missed most of these as I became engrossed in an intelligent conversation with Rent Boy as they were taking place and this was such a rare, if not unique, experience that I was loathe to curtail it by joining the circle on the Pub’s overcrowded balcony but I am sure it was all very funny and you will no doubt see all the photographs of everyone’s spooky costumes when our new Hash Flash puts them on the web site.
On On
PF
